did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
just took a sink shower in Arbys bathroom
would you object to me following you around all the time with a video camera and selling it to TV? Your life could make me millions.
I wonder what it would be like to masturbate in space
Here's an idea...how about I take shots by myself and drunk dial you around noon?
the towel caught on fire outside the hottub but we were all too stoned to care
His beard is glorious and he smells like barbecue. Introduce me to him.
the head trauma was worth the blowjob.
You finished the fifth and then hid two dozen eggs around your apartment and declare that you would "quest for Jesus". Have fun questing today.
How does a law student 15 days away from graduation prepare for a pass fail final? Drinking beer, eating thick cut bacon, and watching game of thrones, that's how
I'm glad our friendship can withstand laughing mid-blowjob during the diarrhea scene in Dumb & Dumber.
Speaking of, what are you doing next weekend? I'm going to a rope bondage seminar and may need a partner if my date bails.
He sent me a dick pic, and it had smeared lipstick on it. So I sent him the pic of my tit with the hickey ring your brother gave me.
Sometimes i wish my vagina automatically turned itself off when i'm legally drunk.
IM FILLED WITH SANDWICHES AND SELF LOATHING
Randomize
