What are these yellow papers in the kitchen?
These are the tickets we got last night.
Did i sign this one as Grizzly Bear?
Yes...yes you did.
New drink name: the Vermont Douchebag. Take shot of maple syrup, drop into cup of jager, bomb.
She wouldn't go home with me cause I forgot her name. I didn't realize it would matter after she danced with her vagina on my face
He had the Transformers symbol tattooed to his chest. We had to do it doggy style so I could laugh into my pillow instead of his face.
You SHOULD feel empty, we were at the top of our game, and by that i mean snorting things we don't understand and only a few steps away from adultery.
You spent most of the night crying and throwing leftover meatballs at the neighbors dogs
Also, even though this really sucks now, we will look back on this one day and laugh at the time we all got arrested on Thanksgiving
Haha keeping the dream alive until Chinese New Year. I'm jobless with stitches in my face.
In hindsight combining orgy Thursday with mystery drink madness was begging for failure
I feel violated by Miley Cirrus's performance in the VMA's.
Is it bad that I tried to build an outfit based around "What do people who use condoms look like when they buy condoms?"
Ok maybe now I get why I'm single I think I just broke a rib pooping
I'm glad you had fun with your genitals.
Typical. We're ready to go, and you're not wearing pants.
Don’t listen to me, I’m walking around wearing nothing but rave bracelets and headphones shouting “yeeeeaaahhhhhh”
Randomize
