I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
He was from Iceland of course I didnt sleep with him, havent you seen Mighty Ducks 2???
I asked my mom if I was the drunkest one in the room. With 8 days till I go back to school, I couldn't care less about being shitfaced at a baptism
Been at work for four hours and just discovered the chairs in my office double as a napping surface. Most productive thing I've done all day
You kept running up to random groups of people and saying "I'm a Dallas Cowboy Cheerleader so we all have to chug our drinks!" and they all listened to you.
I drove two hours just to throw up on myself today at the beach. My family saw the whole thing and my younger cousin cried
Waking up to find your mom holding your birth control pills and telling you I suggest you take this
The worst that could happen is you end up with a black eye and I get laid.. I'm okay with my end of that bargain.
I think the exact words were 'I'd lett him to the weirdest shit to me'
You puked on the bar then proceeded to walk out. I told the bartender some girl walked up, puked and left and he gave me a free drink. Hope you got home safe.
So many Oreos I'm regretting this decision already but I'm happy at the same time...The straddle is real
Struggle. Not straddle. I'm not straddling anyone.
Walk of shaming into my apartment. No one to clap me in. Come home!
Its 11am and I'm eating gummi bears and drinking Tennessee honey in my underwear...this is why I'm self employed
He thought I was gay. I had to explain I just really like wearing flannel.
We had sex then laid in his bed eating chocolate and drinking juice boxes. I think I'm going to keep him around.
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