Ok walking to car, 3 gay guys park get out of car, one on phone says 'I dont know but I was definately getting some curb rubbing'
I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
it hasn't hit me that college is over yet. so far at home, i haven't brushed my teeth, taken off my makeup, or changed clothes before bed.
I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
What a tease, dude. She's giving me emotional blue balls.
Just heard an advertisement for 40 proof chocolate milk. We may never have to grow up
you grabbed the waitors dick and yelled '2nd base' and then he gave you his number. I hate your life.
Almost propositioned sex in exchange for a study guide for my final tomorrow.
We ate a mysterious delivered pizza which no one ordered and then the wii wouldn't work so 20 of us watched porn on two laptops. Drunk took the awkward away.
The 12 year old son winked and made eyes at me while his father fed me vodka gummy bears. Gameday yo
He's sweet and rough. A wonderful contradiction. He's the starburst of sex.
Were you drinking last night?
Because typically I don't associate the phrase 'Go sleepy time' with sobriety.
You can't just beat off while driving someone else's car. Thats a rule
Thats your rule and this car is nice
I looked into this "it's just lunch" matchmaker thing and it was like 5 grand. If I'm gonna spend five grand I'll throw in another three and get new tits and find my own fucking husband.
Last night I drank three beers and threw up in a tree house. I am ashamed.
Randomize
