Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.
He took out the lube and started calling it fuck fluid
she reminds me of the first time i discovered masturbation. that's how you know it's true love.
But on the up side she uprooted a whole peony plant from the hotel downtown and said, "I brought you flowers"
The sex was so good I went temporarily numb. Slightly embarrassing when she pointed out I was kissing my own arm.
If you are drunk already, then as your friend I am advising you to stop writing on your dads Facebook wall
Just casually ripping a bowl in the chicken coop, with the chickens. NBD
You should have seen the pharmacists face when I paid for my inhaler refill and a box of condoms.
You were talking to yourself and eating cold cuts in the kitchen when I found you
I mean of all the things to be cockblocked by, Taco Bell is pretty high on the list
He broke into my house because he missed me. Then ends the relationship because I'm the needy one. Ironic much?
He was semi blacked out in the hallway with a bucket, calling for me while I had sex with his best friend in the very next room. Why do you let me do these things?
Well I hate to admit it but at this point I can successfully say i have been pee'd on by both of my roommates.
tell me about the fingering
Randomize
