Hey, It's Lauren. i wanted to talk to you tonight. I like you, as you know because kyle told you. I was wondering if you liked me too?
Are you in the third fucking grade? Check yes or no.
some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
i am high, trapped with a bunch of skaters and asians watching a cat on lsd on youtube, the girl on the couch next to me is getting fingered, and there is lady gaga playing. god has forgetten about me
Covered in glitter and dick. 2010 feels a lot like 2009.
That's saying a lot from the girl who takes her liquor with her to the library
Apparently Bin Ladens last act of terrorism is cock blocking me....
That is correct. I did in fact somehow pass out in the tanning booth for over an hour. And yes the attendant did have to open it up and shake me awake.
did you just take a shot to penises and friendship?
this hospital has no fireball
Your first mistake was thinking that you could get through the day without drinking a single bottle of alcohol. Your second mistake was wearing shark boxers.
And I got shut down by a ginger. It was a weird night
OH MY GOD did i pee on you?!
I knew I wanted to marry her when we got in that bar fight and she full-nelsoned a guy while I worked his kidneys. I knew then we had to breed
Sorry if that was awkward, i will never call you sober ever again
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
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