you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
Burger king has cupcake flavored milkshakes. God dammit America.
dudes here are drinking wine, and not in the forgivable 'just doing this to get laid' way
Just bought lingerie with the intention of wearing it as a shirt. It's going to be that kind of weekend.
Every single time I start thinking that we shouldn't have done that to him, I think of his ballsack in our passed out faces. No sympathy.
im looking at burger kings website. there isnt one anywhere close to where we were last night. i think it was sent from heaven
i am way too old to be getting fingered at work
its likemy ribs anf my hesrt aew cuddlingn
Oh btw, that was a wonderful blow job. You did a good job.
Mike is worried about me going on a cruise in June without him....how cute he thinks we are going to last till June
I gave him head in my cape. On the kitchen floor. Watching a show about bacon.
The problem is drunk me is completely unaware how poor I am
Well I can't message him and be like "hey I was behind you in CVS a month ago and I remembered your last name and DOB and looked you up on fb and added you so wanna hang out"
Let's be honest, I'm cooking chicken nuggets in my Helm jersey and underwear who has their life more together than me?
You think I could convince him that having sex with another girl isn't cheating?
Randomize
