He spelled "beautiful" wrong in his text
I thought she was going to get passionate and throw her on the bed and fuck her, but she just started breaking stuff.
That's the thing about women.
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
if i were reduced to my simplest elements, i would be jizz and glitter.
This is a dangerous game of "whose life is more pathetic".
If I had a quarter for every time I had sex in your bed while you were out of town, I would probably be a lot more willing to buy you new sheets. Hope you're having a nice vacation.
My professor just told me I'm living a lie and I found puke on my pants. How do you think it's going?
You told me you would ride a pig into the night sky screaming, "I wear my sunglasses at night"
Just an FYI if we break up I'm going to sleep with your cousin or who ever my dealer is.
I stirred my drink with a butcher knife. His roomate keeps giving me dirty looks
Like what do you want from me
So i came so hard i almost passed out, where has this vibrator been all my life?
I had sex with a boy who lives in a closet, that's like having sex with Harry Potter, right?
Wait. How did I get engaged last night?
It was just like the old times. We watched movies and shit. But not like old times-i fucked her hot brother when she was in the shower? Times are a'changin.
I ripped ass in on and around her face during a hard 69. I don't think she'll ever call me again.
Randomize
