bobby jindal makes me wanna cover my ears. you make me wanna smile.
Cruel joke of nature. Hair on head runs from face, and hides on various parts of body. Aging sucks.
You were pissed we didn't change the movie to Eurotrip so you kept singing "Scotty Doesn't Know" over and over until you passed out.
So fucked up. Can't tell if I'm starving or about to puke. Playing it safe and eating froot loops. Tasty in, colorful out.
Dude they have your information. Come back. The sheriffs office is here, they are pissed..please come back otherwise jail is inevitable. Call me
The people at subway are so judgy when you stop to get a sandwhich on your walk of shame
I've drank literally 19 beers and am still good. Utah is worthless
I spent the morning naked in her roommates closet because her parents decided to come over after church..
Got stiff armed by the garbage man on the back of the truck...I just wanted to ride one block dude
About to wash down a xan with an iced pumpkin spiced latte from starbs and I feel like I've never lived up to my stereotype so much at one time
May I make reservations with your penis for this evening?
I'm pretty sure my calc professer is on coke. He's just too excited for this to be an 8am class.
I'll be an awkward "I've had the grooms penis in my mouth" presence and we can party our nipples off.
So your telling me I can lick your ass but you CAN'T spend my money
Shame - the story of my life.
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