So my teacher figured out I made a drinking game out of her lecture. Once my drink was gone she let us out. Happy St. Patricks day class. Your welcome
so apparently the car got towed with me passed out in the back seat.
I found her in the bathroom licking her screwdriver off the floor. she said there was no way she was wasting a $6 drink.
i don't know man, last time i saw her she was applying sunblock to her vagina
St Patricks day needs to be raged like youve never raged before. Like youre in the desert and it starts raining beer. Like it's the day the announced the 21st amendment (which is the one that ended prohibition)
Just copped mushrooms from a dude in a business suit. U comin or what?
It's Been clinically proven that people who have sex 6 or more times per week are happier than those who don't. Just and FYI. For your mental health. From a soon so be psychologist. Who is drunk.
Last week in my political science paper I quoted the Mighty Ducks. This week, I compared the Constitution to a weird pickle law in Connecticut (by law, it's not a pickle unless it bounces). So, yeah, clearly I'm ready to be back to being a college student.
I have really important information for you regarding the furry convention this weekend
Easy Mac and you are the sexiest things in my life
We were going to play manhunt in a strip club, calling it mancunt.
and it's like......my shirt is off and he's talking about quidditch. why.
I need dunkaroos back in my life.
DO NOT THROW SOUP AT YOUR SCREEN
listen i get youre a daddy dom but that doesnt give you a pass to make dad jokes
Randomize