Ikea night.
?
Insert tab A into swedish slot B
I took an adderall but just ended up meticulously arranging my farmville for hours
is 1am too late, or too early to make bacon?
Maybe you should have studied instead of worrying about who is going to have sex with you
new rule: cockblock me if I have had over a fifth of jack. no matter what.
For future reference, when you see people who look like Rosie O'donell, do not tell them they look like Rosie O'donell.
i swear to god. if they dont have practically DTF written on their foreheads, or a glowstick in their hands, strictly no entry.
It's all good. The CSI guy came and I played the theme song while he in was in our place. The cops even laughed.
Girl just walked into the bar with a T-shirt that says "I'm not Irish, kiss me anyways." Target aquired.
He literally wrote out a schedule. On it, there's a taco break, and a spot where I start crying.
I just instagramed a picture of an ostrich in case you were wondering what I did with my night
I just remembered that last night I seriously contemplated swallowing the cap to my toothpaste
I've decided that it's a bad thing. But I've also decided that I don't give a fuck.
I sucked his dick by a creek, how romantic.
I mean go ahead and let your freak flag fly but if you could not fly it in my bed that would be great
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