they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
once he started yelling at me in latin, i wasn't sure what we were fighting about anymore...
You asked the officer if he could bring you to the same jail as T.I.
id pay someone 5 dollars to tell me whos house im at right now. comfy couch though
We should search craigslist for porches to sublet.
I think my hookup is starting to fall for me. Time to break his heart.
The band last night was really good
That was definitely karaoke. Guess that answers my follow up question on how drunk you were.
No you don't understand. This tree is really alive. Like in Pocahontas.
Yes, let me tell you about the time I was forcibly locked in a bathroom when my ex-girlfriend was having a bad shroom trip.
He's talking about me being Slave Princess Leia and how he'll chain me up. I don't have the heart to point out that he would be Jabba in that scenario...Is it bad that his lack of SW knowledge is destroying my lady boner?
Please come collect your inebriated significant other. He just sleep-farted and scared my cats. Please hurry.
YOU CAN'T JUST ADD EVERYONE WHO ENTERS MY VAGINA ON FACEBOOK WTF
Oh my god if I have to go on fetlife to find a guy who will fuck me right around here, I'm going to scream.
We drove through Taco-Bell on our way to the ER
Well my parents know I get medical Cannabis they saw me on the news at the dispensary
Randomize
