Swine flu. Run for my life!
whoever gets the blood i just donated is getting a shit ton of free thc
On my list on ridiculous morning after bus rides home, still sopping wet and carrying a giant straw hat is definitely top five
Jerry just sent me this: IOR GHIT ALL THE BUTTIB. Go get him. Now.
Well he has that kind of carefree attitude that comes from a big penis
Its 6:30 and I'm shotguning a busch ice while taking a shit. Outlook for work today: interesting
I think I broke a hole in her wall trying to do backflips
Last night you told me to stop being Martha Stewart and asked if I had Taco Bell in my house
I may or may not have pissed on my floor last night
Welcome to 22
Sex should not remind me of how baby birds get fed
I'm scared because his knowledge of star trek is turning me on
I keep picking up boring men who literally just want to cuddle. HOW AM I THIS BAD AT GETTING SEX?
How high?! We watched paid programming for 45 minutes before we realized it wasn't just a long commercial. So pretty high. The Bionic fish finder looks promising, though.
Lets get a boat first.
Not sure how my purse ended up in the bushes last night... Or why there was a noodle strainer in the toilet.
You are hungover. Your arguments are irrational an incoherent. We only played twice. Have some Gatorade and take a knee.
Randomize
