You told him your wedding ring was part of your costume. not okay!!
She wrote me a poem titled "Penis Flower" and it wasnt a joke
i wanna anger bang this girl behind me at work. she never shuts up with her annoying voice. but her boobs are phenom.
she refuses to pay for the plan b and so do i. it's the most dangerous game of chicken i've ever been involved in. but i have my pride.
we were fucking and all I could think about is how my silly bands were glowing in the dark.
Legitimate logistical question....how did you pee in your duct tape dress?
Indoor beer darts at Rafs just turned into a trust exercise of putting your hand on the wall and closing your eyes while the other throws.. Almost gave Cale a Tracheotomy
He shoved his balls through an egg carton and showed us a picture. They were surprisingly egg-like.
I'm allowing myself one mistake a year. He gets to be 2012.
He kept singing Happy Birthday to himself, yelling at the bouncers for not letting him in, and telling them his "father will hear of this." He was like a drunken Scottish Draco Malfoy.
Here's to not getting arrested this year on thanksgiving again. Cheers bitches!
It's alright. I'm just trying to make her realize you're not good enough for her.
I just deff did the walk of shame.. His roommate/manager woke us up. A dog scared me on my stumble to the car.
This is why I'm single.
He only has one ball. it was like fucking a cyclops.
At least your wife cheated on you. Women will feel bad for you. In a month there will boy bands that are jealous of your dick
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