you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
I woke up (not at home) to find out I kissed Ryan Caberra, flashed for free gumbys and carried around an inflatable moose named Johnson. Great success.
i hit her car. ill just send her a farmville gift in the morning. then it'll be alright.
all the sharp corners in my house are covered with litter foam blocks. al set for partying
I just looked at my iPhone gps history... "the gas station", "the park with a big scary fence", "the trampoline", and, my favorite, "where we were when we were about to do lines off a bible".
Just tried on my bathing suit for the first time this year. Had to drink a beer to numb the pain.
I feel like we're taking advantage of the fact that our R.A has cerebal palsey.
I joined a mariachi band. they gave me a guitar because i told them i could play. It actually turned out ok
They kicked me out of the mariachi band. Turns out I'm not that good
we were totes just talking about. huu in the bathbub. 5 girlszzz
The beers last night were like the tears from god
most desperate stoner moment might have been when we filled the bong up with pond water
desperate times, desperate measures
It's official. Those are now your come fuck me flipflops
Whatever the emoticon is for "balls deep". That.
I need my daily rules like rule one don't put your dick in the vacuum cleaner
I'm fucking blazing boy. 5hr weed sauce kicked in and my entire face feels like an 8ball of gold bond flying down a mountain of Fresh powder. Just gliding.
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