Walk of Shame. In a state park.
any chance you can send me your legal ethics outline, in exchange for say, me buying you a lapdance the next time we go to the strip club?
My brother just woke up to see me on te couch dipping hamburger buns into pizza sauce. I'm beginning to question the life choices that led to this moment.
Nope. If I'm going to drive an hour to fuck a teacher, it will NOT be missionary thats for damn sure.
If I don't have the money by then, I'll pay you in sex.
It's going to be 23.5 times of sex and 19 blow jobs. I just googled it.
The drunk mom in a firefighter hat just told her to leave.
I think id rather titty fuck an A cup than deal with what happened tonight again. shits depressing
I'd say it's his fault for never running us through proper protocol for "catching your RA in the middle of him banging some girl"
my mom snuck into my room, washed her clothes and made her breakfast. what the fuck she's a better boyfriend than I am
Have you seen him ? Seriously. No one is that straight.
As long as he continues to be our subleaser and continues to fuck me, I think it's acceptable for me to steal a piece of bread here and there.
I'm not asking for life coaching, I'm just asking if you know where I left my underpants.
Dashing through the vodka, in a tinder swiping rage, all the fuck boys get a no, laughing all the way.
i havent showered for 4 days and i just made my dog smell my arm pit. also, im stoned.
when ur drunk laser tag is all fun n games. try it high and all of the aliens in the galaxy want you dead.
Randomize
