Dude, the girl i fucked last night left wearing my high school musical shirt you bought me. she also left her panties here though.
The one with Zac Efrons face on it? You definitely got the short in of the stick. i'd rather have the shirt
fuck. yeah me too. i don't even think these panties would fit me
Found moms dildo in drawer while looking for socks, and its wet
The sex was so good, I called my ex during the 2nd time just so he could hear. Is that mean?
Yeah, the furnace guy just pulled out 4 empty and 1 full beer bottle from the vent. You are no longer allowed over.
2nd night home for break and we had to call the fire department to keep the house from burning down. At this rate I'll be lucky to see you next semester.
drunken yoga. on the beach. senior week. you have been chosen <3
decision: in honor of being in new orleans this weekend all my drunk texts will be en francais
Remember, ur body isn't a visitors center
Perfect. And my grandma just called me and talked to me for eighteen minutes telling me that she was worried because of my Halloween costume that I'm not a Christian and that I'm not eating. Wtf.
It's really not cool dreaming about going into labor with your ex boyfriends love child as you're sleeping next to him.
candyland with pharmaceuticals ... what could go wrong
I cannot describe the pre-ejaculative horrors thru the medium of text messaging
Halfway through the blowjob she stopped and said 'Wait I know this dick'.
I'm cleaning my apartment while naked. Anyone who says that's not why they want to live on their own is lying.
We're exchanging our favorite porn sites at 9 am. I think this brings our relationship to a whole new level
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