Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
He was sucking on my finger.... and it was at that moment that I thought: Man. I wish I had a penis.
After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
I tried to discuss modern art with a cab driver after explaining that I only had one shoe on b/c a pitbull ate the other one. Wtf. Call me when you can.
Pretty sure I scared him off for good. The lesbian in me is ecstatic.
What kind of costume was that supposed to be??
I'm an orgasm trader!
I had sex with marker all over my face so I can do just about anything.
Most desperate stoner moment; dropped our hard earned resin ball in the sand, rinsed it off and then did knife hits in the kitchen cuz we broke our only pipe
He said he doesnt believe in the female orgasm,so no I did not have sex with him.
We were having sex in the gardens when the grounds keeper walked up on us. He gave me a thumbs up and walked away
I'm 2 beers deep on an empty stomach, and I just wanna say, I pride myself on my use of commas
I didn't want sex last night, but she charmed my dick out of my pants like a snake charmer.
So I'm just casually at the grocery store when I remember that there's still a clove of garlic in my vagina
Did you just email Kelly and I gay dinosaur erotica?
My apologies. I'll try not to let my dick interfere with official work duties in the future.
Randomize
