you threw up in the oven last night. i found that out after i preheated it to cook a pizza.
I took a picture of his ID so i could remember how to spell his last name and facebook stalk him later...I think he saw me do it
Because ur a stupid bitch
Actually, I'm graduating from college on Saturday so that makes me a well educated bitch.
Appropriately today was the first time I've ever GTL'd. I can't believe I made fun of this,it's rather relaxing.
I almost puked on my graduation application. perfect.
i'll prob lay in bed. its weird not having to track my wallet down, its become such a weekly habit. i suddenly have so much free time
Hey couldn't find water bottle to put margs in whole bottle in purse gonna stop and get cups and ice from starbucks and burrito from una mas want a quesadilla
At least my fat-chick-ratio has not been that bad this semester ...
Does having a sippy cup full of wine, at an outlet mall, qualify you as 'having a problem'?
She walked in on her brother jacking off and she hasn't been the same since. She's been crying and shaking non-stop. It's been two weeks.
We were fucking while the tv was on, and one of those animal cruelty commercials came on. We then switched over and started doing it doggy style. It was then that I realized that I'm going to hell.
Zak is like the Picasso of masterbatory texts
You were making out w/ur brothers coach against a door when someone opened it and you both fell through... Then you continued to make out on the ground
I woke up with a hangover and a man bun. Reached over to drink water and accidentally chugged raspberry vodka. So there's that.
I'm laying in bed cuddling with my teddy bear and eating waffles. I need a fucking boyfriend
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