just saw someone in just a bathrobe not even tied shut run to the bathroom with a facefull of cum. Someone had a good night
I came in your room, you looked at me and said "I fucked up" and then some kid showed up and took you to the hospital
there is a dorito bag in my car full of my mouth blood
Sorry about sucking tonight. Drunk truck fucking is apparently not my strong point.
Sorrye. The bathtuv says hi. But theresno water in it. I've wanted too tell you for the longest, but nevr could
Also my vagina isn't a crater of death where nothing comes out
After seeing all of the pics during the trial, all I could think was "her vagina doesn't look THAT dangerous"
I think he bit my vagina. Who does that?
I'm pretty sure I just smoked a chunk of cat food. Thought it was something else. No reply needed.
ANNA YOU PEED ON THE STREET. LIKE NOT EVEN SUBTLY. YA JUST SQUATTED IN THE MIDDLE OF THE HIGHWAY. And you flashed your tits to oncoming vehicles to try to get them to pick us up
What even was the context for that. All I have written down is "I would vote for President SnakeJaw."
I used an explanation of Walking Marriages in the Mosuo Culture to successfully negotiate an open relationship. That Anthropology degree is finally starting to pay off.
I don't think he liked your vagina hand signal
I wanted to waterboard myself with beer, but no one would give me their shirt to do it.
You ran the halls of the dorm naked handing out condoms. You were the sex fairy. Best you can do if you're not getting laid.
Randomize
