Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
i was in the bathroom puking my brains out, a girl walked in and said "i just came to do the same thing" so i told her i would move over and share the toilet. its better than being alone.
Halfway through banging her I realized that she was playing a sex playlist on her iPod...first time actually having sex to R.Kelly's "bump and grind"
thanks for stopping by when you did. making a meatball quesadilla while high was a bad choice
Just think about it this way, every time you work Sunday, it's another $75 and that equals another hooker when we go to Amsterdam.
Someone changed my text signature to "Also, I think I might be gay" last night. Also, I think I might be gay
its the kind of night you break several limbs and say you were lucky
We told her to calm down. She said "I'm Buddha!". Then army crawled to the cooler for more vodka.
Thanks for launching me off you reverse cowgirl. I think I chipped a tooth.
The three of us were sitting silently in my dining room at 4:30 am, half drunk, eating cold spaghetti and listining to death metal. I need a fucking cigarette.
Dude, she set my Tinder preference to men, set the radius to 100 miles, and used up all of my right swipes. I think she's mad.
Oh hello Jordan's parents, I'm here to have sex with your son. He's in the shower? Oh great, I'll join him
Here when you come to your senses come back here and I'll fuck you back out of them.
Just make sure you put pants on
....then im not going
imagine the bill from school house rock beating the shit outta you
Randomize
