felt a little awkward waiting for my McNuggets after vomiting all over the counter
all I know is I'm really rwfly really really stoned and a bunch of Korean people are yelling at me
i was gonna do a lot worse than just throw cat food on you while you were passed out, but then you sleep vomited and i felt a little bad
Bonus points if the penis has a little hat too
I need to think of the best way to tell this boy he's not getting his pants back
The fuck-me-pumps were hot, the XL hoody kinda ruined it.
I just got head while watching air force one. Harrison ford would be proud.
fucked a girl in Bentley hall at ten tonight, came on the carpet and I plan on doing it in another building soon. Watch where you walk
My coworker's brand new computer showed up today. He's on vacation for the next week. Brian and I are installing Windows 98 on it.
look for me at the Giants game I will possibly be the drunk girl passed out by 2nd
Knew i was going to puke. So i grabed a bowl out of the kitcken in the dark before bed...Ended up puking into a spaghetti strainer...
It does not feel like it was just this morning that I had a penis in multiple cavities of my body
Opening my shipments of mascara and nipple pasties this morning like a boss bitch
Fruitcakes are only good for throwing at neo Nazis.
He flipped a shopping cart in the back room and had to leave to make a jazz playlist. If we aren't in love then i don't know what love is.
Randomize
