you kept calling numbers in ur phone book and saying, "I love your show, I'm a long time listener, first time caller."
you win again, gameday.
If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
I am self-sufficient. I puked in a wine glass and emptied it in the trash. Points for style and neatness
Dude, did you really "knight me" and tell me I had permission to bang your sister last night?
I can't believe you're asking me to think of a sincere, creative way to apologize to your penis at 2 am.
lets talk about you, dubstep, and a bunny suit.
Is drinking before noon still a bad idea if you invent an amazing cocktail?
I'm gonna send you a dick pic now just so your uncomfortable at work
I just looked down and realized I was walking around in briefs and a ninja turtle shirt; and for a second, I thought I was 8 again... Weird...
she opened a can of olives, drained the juice and poured ranch dressing in. oh and 'croutons' (saltines) on top...
I don't think "growing medical marijuana" is Quite what my Grandfather had in mind when he thought me about gardening as a child
I now have a "weirdest thing a guy ever did in bed" story. Cut my fingernails.
Yeah I'm gonna need you to stop it right there.I know this is supposed to be a safe space but Imma have to exit.
That means I have to put pants on. That is not something I am willing to do right now.
Just fucked my ex's brother. It is clear I dated the wrong one. Is it wrong for me to continue to fuck this one?
Randomize