got some bad news about ur virginity. she didnt make it thru the night
Im going to buy a thermometer. If its above 104 im going to the hospital if its under 104 im going to the bar
White grape blunt wraps are like the equivalent of a glass of wine in a tux.
She thought that based on the way she feels that she got drugged last night, but come on, her turn on word is hello, who needs to drug that??
The countdown is at hand. We are 15 days from so much Jameson that names will be forgotten. Prepare your liver now or severe projectile vomiting will be the theme of the night.
I found his Linkedin the day after he created it. Too stalkerish or just right?
can I cover your dick in cookie butter?
Also I feel I should tell you last night when I came home I fell into my laundry hamper and woke up in a pile of my clothes
If the sex wasn't incredible why would I compare it to cheesy tots
Plus idk what to say. Like hello dapper gentleman will you pursue me in a midnight hangout where I can be choked
How is it that 364 days a year I'm the adult, but on Halloween you completely forget how to have fun and become my grandma?
I don't think I can get drunk, high or horny enough to even consider that
It involves me, my best friend, and a stripper and her mother.
We left Waffle House and he took off running five miles down the road saying we were "training for the Olympics." And I mean, I couldn't leave him out there like that...
I collect Covid conspiracy theories like I collect Pokemon.
Randomize
