you're dressed like that and you're on the rag, that's false advertisment
mom just told me i had to find a fake by next wednesday.
I'm wearing boardshorts as underwear to work. This is bachelorhood
Of all the things I am low enough to do, how could you even doubt if that was one of them?
Just saw a homeless man taking a shower in someone's sprinkler system....
I found what appears to be half an E pill and part of a tooth in my pocket this morning
I'm gonna make a mold of your dick so I can make popsicles
Between the walk of shame, bar fight, karaoke, injuries, number of bar check-ins, and variety/quantity of alcohols and Advil consumed, I'd say HookerFest 2012 was a raging success.
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
I'm sending midget strippers dressed as bull fighters with mini bottles of 1800 to your house. Already made the call. Jer is going halves on it. Can't be stopped! Won't be stopped!
He dislocated his shoulder trying to finger me last night if that tells you anything
Hey remind me the get the pancakes out of my jacket
I like shiny stuff tho if that’s an emotion
what color bed sheets say meditative warrior but also welcome to my sex dungeon...
navy blue
The fact that you have an answer to that is why we are friends...
My ultimate hope is that people will hug me, smell me, and therefore think I'm classy.
Randomize
