if you call bong hits and onion rings a party, then yeah
The cops found weed in michael jacksons house today...it makes up for the child molesting, I like him more now.
Just gave my manager part of my viccodin stash-my job is basically secured forever.
Oh, I'm sorry. I'd rather be "doable" than "the fat chick"
Just picture a dyson vacuum with razor blades. That's how it felt.
So. Do you think marshmallow vodka in hot chocolate while eating a graham cracker would = s'mores?
In some strange universe, yes
He wants to hookup..at the fair..this is our chance to leave him stranded with no clothes.
Is it possible to be sexually attracted to someone's hair?
I feel like I should treat myself every time I find out I'm not pregnant. Is there a pie company that delivers??
Honestly I volunteered because the email made it sound like it was a once in a lifetime opportunity to be a sexual spy kid.
Come get me...at gazebo by side entrance....im passed out in a bush...this is a Bar A bouncer texting for your buddy
HE LIVES IN ANOTHER STATE
actually scratch that last text, he's the perfect boyfriend. He stays faithful and doesnt find out about all the guys here. it's a win-win
Okay everything with a penis is officially dead in my eyes
I may have dislocated my hip getting fucked on the bathroom counter
would it be awkward if i bring my husband?
only if i fuck you in the bathroom while he's paying the check
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