I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
The camp director doesn't care if we drink and i'm running the rifle range. Someone is going to get sued.
we found you in the closet, clutching coats that werent yours for stability
My dry heaving is complicating my ability to speak.
he handed me my panties in front of my date. turns out he wasn't that mad.
Sorry we're taking so long, this weed cake tastes amazing with Tabasco sauce on it.
My therapist thinks I shld paint u something to show u my appreciation 4 ur friendship. 1) she must think I'm rite on the brink of no friends 2) this is real
I may or may not be wearing slippers and a TMNT hat. This thing better not have a dress code.
Just woke up and spent the first hour of consciousness throwing up with the Rocky theme song on repeat.
That's how all the girlfriends are. Oh he's a boy, no worries, then BAM. I blow their boyfriend.
coughing up blood. I'm leaving for the doctor now. P.S. I just won $350 on the wheel of fortune machine in the casino.
Sorry for all the snapchats, I wanted you to feel like u were in America getting plastered with me
I just wanna get drunk in a castle. Is that so much to ask?
how should I feel if a guy kept complimenting my bangs while I was giving him a blowjob?
dude new orleans is fucking wild these two guys just performed dueling banjos except they were actually fighting with the banjos
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