I just found that girl ____ on facebook, her activities include "church nursery" yikes
Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
Went to bed at 4 in a strangers bed. woke up wearing scrubs, realized i was gonna be late for work so i just wore the same clothes as the day before... i don't have a toothbrush and im pretty sure there is leftover semen in my mouth. at some point i think i was at the beach cuz theres is sand in my underwear. i love newport already.
she looks like someone took a bunch of spare parts and glued them all on one face. it's quite horrifying.
is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
she took her bra off and it was like the puppet strings had been dropped. her tits totally deflated.
when i woke up this morning i blew my nose and ash came out.. i'm not sure what to make of this.
Just found out the guy that gave me herpes died. now everytime I get a flare up, it'll be like he's coming back to say hello
And I'm not sure if that's how you pluralize penis. Never planned on needing to know that in my life.
After she saw a msg in his phone from me that listed the reasons why I love his cock, I don't think I can deny fucking her ex.
I woke up with flowers, a tiara & pasta salad in my bed. Tequila makes me act like a fat Disney princess
This is going to be one of those "I can only do this high" classes
On my way home from the dentist. Was going to call and see if you would like to wake and bake, then remembered my sister is an adult
She swallowed the key to the cuffs, I've been having to explain the pink fuzz all morning.
So instead of going to meet her mom, I decided to jump out of her window which was about 1.5 stories off the ground. I'm alright, but I ended up meeting her mom anyway.
Randomize
