Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
Forget about socially acceptable. Make me happy instead
How young is too young to ask my kid to make me a drink?
after drinking 6 jumbo margaritas he then proceeded to tell the entire restaurant that he was going to "bust a load in me" when we got home....how do you think the rest of my night went?
HOnestly. That's my one goal for this whole trip. I don't give a shit about souvenirs or sand. I want penis.
I don't know if its because i'm stoned or what but painting my kitchen yellow makes it look crooked
5am is far to early to be on jagerbomb number 6 right now
Sorry if I put you in that 'glad we're hanging out but I'm gonna go fuck your cousin' kind of position
I should just black out in my front yard again- that was a great nights sleep.
I woke up wearing a lax pinnie under my shirt, a triathlon medal, and a dora backpack... I think I had fun
Pagan metal show. There is a folk dance happening in the mosh pit. Also, I have no idea where we are.
Fucking holidays. How do I have this many men who want to fuck me and none of them are available when I'm ready to blow my top?
Lets just say I tried to pinky promise the cop... So I was fucked up.
I was told that I need a reference for my blow job skills. Be expecting a phone call tomorrow.
We won like $80 last night at the casino, so if we get the Plan B we still have enough to get your basic bitch latte from Dunkin. Calm down.
Randomize
