Ugh, here's a dating tip. Hairy legs are a major turn off
hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
We played Russian Roulette with a revolving Nerf gun. If you shot yourself in the face, you had to drink.
i feel as uncomfortable as your camel toe looks.
Oh my god please beg your father to turn the car around so you can possibly get laid by a knight at medieval times.
just peed in rthe mens room but seranaeded them with adelle the whole timee so they didnt mind
But I mean, have you ever just LOOKED at how majestic penises are? They are like ivory columns of pure wonder!
I have a diplomatic trade for you. My pants for your rum. Tomorrow?
how many ponies have to be on my pajama pants to convince him im gay?
i think we need a new approach.
How do I tell your little brother I lost my virginity wearing nothing but his socks?
Formal letter or email.
I'm eating hummus off of my stomach right now.
ARTHUR IS ON FUCKING NETFLIX THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
In hindsight following that black guy in the ghostbusters costume was a terrible decision on everyone's part
Dude, never piss off a hungover boss.
Shelly has the weirdest luck. Dude offered her a job riding a bucking bronco and it was not porn or stripping but an actual g-d cow.
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