I think I kinda wanna bone that ginger from Harry Potter.
You literally just made my flesh crawl.
Just fyi NOT a good idea to drunkenly insert your NuvaRing after chopping jalepeno peppers
ok, im coming! i just found some lemon square in my bangs, washing that out..this shit is all over me! was i in a pie eating contest?
yes
did i win? did you like my outfit? or should i change, if you were horny would you bang me?
He was from Iceland of course I didnt sleep with him, havent you seen Mighty Ducks 2???
So you have no knowledge as to why I am hearing loud repetitive mooing from next door?
and then he proceeded to take what he called, a whip cream shower.
It's official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world.
Dude found out there's an open bar at the celebration of life thing for my grandma which is at noon. Now I know why I can drink so much
He played pinball with my ovaries. He won.
He professed his love for me while I danced on a picnic table with a bottle of Absolut. I said thank you and walked away.
Sexual favors are the only currency recognized by the Republic of Greg
Our nipples touched last night. It was tender.
ICE CREAM AND CAKE BITCHESSSSSS
We had sex and then ordered pizza after. This relationship is looking good so far.
Can you imagine doing supermarket sweep in a sex store? What's the sex store equivalent of a whole ham?
Randomize
