i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
i found a dude playing guitar on the portapotty
his cum shot went directly into his bellybutton. felt like i was playin ski ball
I don't think anyone has ever said "boy I'm glad I took those shots of everclear" when they wake up
the extent of background information i have on her is minimal, but it will get me in her pants
There are going to be so many Snookis this Halloween that I might just dress as the guy that hit her and punch them all in the face
Just bought a waterproof mattress cover. Bring it on sophomore year.
I'm sorry I can't get drinks with you. I have to make sure my dad doesn't go to jail.
I'm going to die alone in my chair and get eaten by my cat. That kind of break up.
the cops accepted 42 wallaby way Sydney. and the cops, and cab driver accepted the new address. please tell the win i am experiencing
I just woke up in my locked bathroom. It's 5 PM. What happened?
Now I don't feel like I'm sweating cheeseburger all the time.
2015 is a year for health and mental stability and alas we are not yet there so yolo
One day soon I'll learn the difference between a good high and way too high. Today is not the day.
i ordered what the bartender said was called a pink cock, and kept saying it tastes like a disney princess. thats how my 21st bday went
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