he said i look beautiful when i cum. i think i'm in love.
you kept searching pizza on facebook and becoming a fan of each page dedicated to it
Brutal- a couple weeks back I had a 28 hr blackout and four day hangover. S'why I decided to haul it in
my friend thinks you're hot & wants to fuck you ps i'm my friend
I paid your brother in tostitos to drive me home.
I think this is the rare instance where the babysitter should get sex as payment from the person being babysat plus you'll get birthday sex. It's a win-win.
Currently sitting in the movie theatre bathroom while she gives him a blowjob in the parking lot. Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend.
The wizard has you scheduled for a 6am sex breakfast
I'm so there
Just because he told you it was safe doesn't mean you should have licked it.
You know that girl that climbed through my window and got in my bed with me and fucked me? It turns out she was real and has a real boyfriend who is real pissed
What the matter? A girl can't play some Super Mario without being accused of being high?
She has also never texted me first which I think might be a tell-tale sign she wants me to die alone.
Remember when we made out in a Chik-Fil-A drive thru?
I had to try on three different bathing suits to hide my boob hickies
If my one night stand asked me to move in with him right after does it still count as a one nighter?
Randomize
