How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
As a pleasant surprise..I woke to find a Burrito and Bottle of Gatorade .....Merry XMAS to ME
First thing I heard on the radio when I got in the car: "humans and dinosaurs used to live happily together"... I need to stop listening to Christian radio...
My hand is eating my burrito and not saving any for my mouth. TRIPPPPPPPPPPPPPPINN!
So the bar isnt gonna put that broken window on my tab. appaerently they want cash
I can't be held responsible for my own vagina. Let's just be honest here.
She's like the Michael Jordan of alcoholism
College: when you have to set an alarm to start drinking
I guess she fell asleep at the strip club and the other one was crying because she had a vagina in her face. Happy 21st!
You're too young to have this sort of Grizzled Old Drunk In Roadside Bar wisdom.
Just paid for my STD meds using a giftcard I got for Christmas. Thanks mom.
I stole the butter cup cuz i brought home my rolls and chicken and didnt want the butter everywhere. I miss your body because its amazing.
I'm eating chicken wings naked and hungover at 10am... Happy bday to me
He sent me a picture of his cock that seemed to indicate that we were still on good terms.
And the you walked in and said to the only under age dude "IM NOT SLEEPING WITH YOU TONIGHT!!!" You may not have high standards but thanks for not sleeping with my brother!
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