i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
Hungover. Be in at noonish. Turn my monitor on and put a hot cup of coffee on my desk so the boss thinks I'm in
All i remember is Liz dragging me home yelling at me, crying, and barfing
So puking trix and chicken wings is horrible but atleast we got free drinks for taking the trash out at the bar we are really movin up in the world
She fuckin peed on me
Stay golden ponyboy
YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL.
BTW send me your address and size of condoms you wish your lover was-- "if you build it, they will come"
I enjoy it and I rock at it. I wish there were a respectable way to make giving blow jobs a career.
My boyfriend sold my favorite shoes right off my fucking feet last night outside the bar. It might have played a part in our breakup today.
Idk man, most things I eat are even better than I expected. Like when I drunkenly put mac and cheese on a slice of cheese pizza or when I soberly put mac and cheese into a Taco Bell burrito.
Rule #61 of being a lady: never get fingered by a finger with a knuckle tattoo
Mom called last night while I was at the bar and asked where I was. I told her I was on the highway to the danger zone while the guys were humming the top gun theme.
I'll be home soonish I need 4th of July sex, it's the American thing to do.
After we had sex he began to tell me the craziest places he's had sex. He told me KFC bathroom so I rolled over and went to sleep.
its not much but to go through all that to ask for half a balls worth of money was so stressful
Randomize
