he wants to bone in the snuggie
she just put all the cheese in the refrig to sleep.. and yes we did finish you bottle.
We're going on a mission for new porn. And ice cream.
Took an aderol, wrote a differential equation for solving volume of flow of a rectangular channel with change in depth, then masturbated for the 6th time.
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
I am the master of subtle flirting. I seduced him by simulating a hand job with an epi-pen during training.
I'm bringing a flask to the test on friday. If I'm gonna fail at least I can enjoy the experience
You know, it doesn't really count as a walk of shame if you guys showered together the next morning
That sucks about the drama. But hey, it's always a good day when you see someone get tazed!
So who won the naked front yard Olympics last night?
Well my tits are spray painted gold & i have what i think r the Olympic rings shaved in my vag !!!!!!!SO its safe to say i won something ....
"just because you look like a short version of scarlet johanson does not mean I would immediately fuck you" that was the single.most difficult thing to say. but seriously I don't want the roots of the whore tree anywhere near my junk.
I have 7 papers to write and I already bought gas station ice cream in my pjs and questioned whether or not a beer float was a thing.
My sunday was babysitting three big, drunk, crying Swedes. Unless your day involved four or more giant drunk swedes I don't want to hear about it.
Hmmm... I thought we agreed as a group we make our last stand in Philly...
I don't wanna go out like that. Covered in melted cheese smelling like a sewer rat...
Yeah I blacked out in a wiener costume.... I think I'm ready to come home now.
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