Reminder- he's a douche bag. A big one.
The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
we're taking a shot everytime we receive a "Happy Thanksgiving!!!!!" mass text. up to 7 since 10am. God help us.
all i remember is stealing his cheesepuffs and shaving my vagina in the hotel lobby
My TA just asked me why I was late to class. How do I say because I was having the best orgasm of my life in Arabic?
It's my diet secret . . . it's like slimfast but I call it cockfast instead.
I feel like everything in this room is sweating
You get to be the grown up. Leave a ciabatta by his face.
I'm sending you the three minute video I jus took,....it's of me eating a pear up close
No. 70% of the female population would find them attractive. The other 30% are lesbian and even they would appreciate them for their strong bodies and athletic capabilities.
All I'm saying is that if you have time for a 20 min shower bj you have time for me
I made out with a guy who was dressed as Borat
And like a minute in, I was like oh fuck what am I doing
Did you run away?
I DANCED AWAY.
that's what I'm here for. I'm literally just bad advice mixed with motivational sentences.
Regardless I WANT TO BE YOUR SEX DISPENSARY. that is like the career I was born for.
I would like you to know, a bag of cheese cubes just attacked me at work.
Randomize
