he made me salute his american flag boxers before i took them off
I mean i might have to drop this class tomorrow. I just walked into a midterm
found the other keg... it's in the tree
It's 9:30am and I've already blown three loads. Reason #101 I love 25 year old girls.
I started singing the national anthem on a train in London. Happy 4th of July assholes
We fucked so hard that when I orgasmed I tore his towel rack off the wall. He was more impressed than mad.
It's like the bat signal. He only texts me when I'm naked.
I don't know which I need first...a shower or a confessional.
I want to get a list going called "D list celebs I've kissed"
He said you asked to eat pepperoni off his dick and he thought it was weird
I mean I thought it sounded fun
I just shaved my pubes into a heart shape. if that doesn't scream romantic idk what does
The smoothie place is closed, but the liquor store is open and wine is kinda like a smoothie.
He apologized for cumming on my leg, but not for ghosting me for 3 weeks before :(
Just make sure you put pants on
....then im not going
According to the rule of quantum porn mechanics, the mere thought of something kinky causes it to exist. So out there, somewhere, there is already riddler/smurf porn...
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