The solution to mudbutt is never ever Clorox wipes. It stings soooooooo bad.
I just woke up. In the port-o-potty next to our tailgate. an hour after the game started. explain.
at first I thought it was funny, but looking at it now, it screams "dramatic" and "medicated wipes."
Waiting outside the STD clinic 30 min before it opens already in a line up. It's like were all waiting for a concert that no ones really pumped for
She definitely looked like a troll, but I had take one for the team. Or at least thats what I keep telling myself
Well, he's moving. Now my only options are to accept it or fake a pregnancy; and since you are my only pregnant friend I'm going to need you to pee on this stick for me.
My chiropractor just high fived me for getting drunk enough to throw my back out this weekend.. Life. Complete.
I really really need to have and out of body experience just so I can talk to myself about this shit that I'm doing with my life.
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
Fucking that physical therapist guy was the best decision I ever made.
dude, where are you? this beer run has taken so long i read war and peace, took a nap, and shaved 3 times.
I stood in my living room with two beers in my hand asking these said beers if they were going to drink each other. I then insisted that I would drink them and chugged both. Happy Halloween.
If I'm gonna have a rotation of guys, I really should stop them leaving boob bruises...
Not only do I have a well-defined bite mark on my arm, but I also have a perfectly clear bruise of a handprint wrapped around my arm like a tribal tattoo. Thoughts on how that happened?
Even in drag you're still better looking than your sister.
Randomize
