If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
so he just called his new girlfriend by my name and she was too drunk to even notice how awkward..
Let's review the facts-we're bored, we have a ton of beer, and we live 5 minutes from the zoo. This equation is easily solvable
I want to apologize but I don't know how. Do I just say "sorry for OD'ing on your couch"? I think that just sounds weird.
Make me a sandwich
The day you make me feel like my detachable showerhead does I'll make you a sandwich.
I think we should go through the tsa checkpoint with raging hardons when we go through LAX. I think we should pass out some viagra to everyone
Pretty sure I scared him off for good. The lesbian in me is ecstatic.
He filled four shots of Everclear and walked around saying "FREE VODKA SHOTS". he is to blame.
She wants me to spank her and yell "Kerry! Your father is disappointed with your choices!" Fuck up but crazy hot? Or just fuck up crazy?
Do you think kicking my coke habit is a good personal goal to put down on the evaluation form?
He said you asked to eat pepperoni off his dick and he thought it was weird
I mean I thought it sounded fun
Great news. I WILL BE FUCKING IN A BOUNCY HOUSE TOMORROW.
Do me a favor and scream dirty things at him in a polite sexy, come hither way
At least get laid and waffle fries out of it you whipped basterd
U were so upset when the shower ruined ur nachos. I didn't kno what to do.
Randomize