I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
he just quoted gucci mane to try and get me to give him head.
I've reached the slutty point of no return. And it feels like multiple orgasms and coke lines
I forgot my id and a man called soup is buying me vodka.
No. Her boobs are the one spot of warmth in my life right now and I will not let you take them from me.
I don't know what possessed you to do that, but you have to give the stripper more money before you try to check her oil or they are going to throw us out every time you do that.
Would I be bad if I bought a pregnancy test at shoppers the same time I hand in a resume? Or do you think it would get me the job?
I ate her out for so long I might actually shit a vagina
I'm still pretty drunk right now, but when this hangover hits me, I'm going to be super pissed. It's a preemptive never drinking again.
On the train at 650am after a night of clubbing and running away from a new zealander who was buying us beers but also licking windows
apparently my new 420 ritual is to look at the clock at 4:20 and realize i'm already too high
Is it possible to sluttify a hobbit costume? Cause if so, this will be my biggest accomplishment.
After we won I just ran all over campus for a couple hours. Then made out with a guy on a bench
I achieved the level of drunk I wanted even with the length of dress I was in..
I dunno. The drunker I get, the easier econ gets. I may be onto something here.
Randomize
