It's true. Ladies love me because I'm so strong and they feel safe. Not because of my pseudo charm and their impaired judgement after several drinks...
she's like "i'm so proud of u" ... and then i threw up on myself
needless to say, I hope she has to get an abortion again
this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
Still bad at ganbling. Still good at dringing.
maybe if i keep dancing i won't throw up
I feel like my teeth are caked on with other teeth. What did I just smoke?
I have bruises everywhere. I think I took "the drinks are strong" as more of a challenge than a warning.
Turns out puking in your mask makes it even harder to see out of the mask..
Oh god. It's like a broken faucet. My guts sound like a bilge pump clogged with golf balls and cake frosting.
I'm gonna rob all up in that cradle
I got your flops too. But yeah you rolled off your raft a bunch of times so we had to ask the white trash squad to help you back on. You bit one of them
just woke up on my patio with a mouse eating cheetos off mys chest. youre all assholes.
I threw my shoes out of frustration and walked home barefoot... can you help me find my shoes in the morning
I think I'm emotionally ready to start being a slut again. I'm excited.
Randomize