i was so high last night that i actually googled "how to get un high"
if you ask that question again our friendship is over
I bet her clit looks like pig in a blanket.
just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
hot pretzels for dinner, snacks, and now breakfast...oh to be a poor college student...everyday is like a carnival.
Fucking him was like shopping for my first training bra.. Embarrassing yet extremely useful
I lost my grandmas ring. Probably during the handjob.
Cops came. Forced us to take the "Honk and We'll Drink" and the "Free Shots to Father's of Freshman Daughters" signs down. Before we did, someone honked and the cop said, "Aren't you gonna drink?" They then told us to move the party inside by ten.
As hard as i've been partying lately their gonna have to revoke my organ donor status
I've decided that my night was probably over when I started eating the penne vodka with my hands.
It's 4/20 of course I'm going to smoke in the portapotty and be ripped outta my mind at the lung cancer walk.
If it's any consolation, I made really strong brownies yesterday and had 3 and then I saw demons
I stole a tiki torch last night and just returned it. Things have been better.
The only people who will bring me pizza or tacos want a commitment and I'm hungry for food not their love.
Ugh I feel like I just got hit by a big giant sex bus.
So, were you planning on telling me you left your panties in my glovebox??
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