i'd date him for the sole reason that he thanks me after giving him head
Just found out that wake n bake is not one of the 7 habits of highly effective people..
i was in the bathroom puking my brains out, a girl walked in and said "i just came to do the same thing" so i told her i would move over and share the toilet. its better than being alone.
His shopping cart was nothing but malt liquor and zucchini.
Not to make her into that kind of girl, but she did have a condom mural
threw up in the library. i should be embarrassed, but i'm willing to bet that i'm one of the first so i'm kinda proud.
at some point i feel off my bar stool straight into the arms of a gay guy. just my luck.
you almost dropped the shot glass then you thought you were such a hard ass for catching it that you slammed it on the table and broke it
It's a lightpost hitting you in the head. Of course it's going to hurt the day after.
U have to come, I miss the sound of you throwing up.
We hooked up and then we watched game of thrones while he fed me chocolate. I don't see how our benafriendship is a bad thing.
Yep if he's taking selfies he's probably on drugs again.
I mean, he's 40, foreign, artsy but with substance abuse problems and estranged children. How is he not my type?
Margaritas just taste better when they're bigger than your head
We had a pink drink in honor of my underwear and apparently I made out with our bartender... a few times
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