their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
Scream out, "Tax-Free dick over here" in the bar. Ladies love tax free stuff
We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
I had to call maintenance to come unclog the toilet.
Something to remember me by.
just threw up on dog. broke microwave with cheese and spoon. having a bath with my barbies singing final countdown.
before you ask yes i found the absinthe under your bed. ITS THE FINAL COUNTDOWWWWNNNNNN
I still don't understand how I went from crying to blowing you in like two minutes.
I've slowly been stuffing french fries down his pants. I'm at 31 and he hasn't even noticed.
He was drinking a long island through his Breathalyzer tube.
The cops knocked on our door just to ask us if we were really having a no-pants party.
i love him because he let me keep my UGGS on while we had sex
They ran out of ice at the party, so I fixed my drink with frozen broccoli....the show must go on!
I have a present for you
Like a legit gift, not just me showing up and getting naked
I told you being able to play expert on guitar hero would get us laid one day
He's interpretive dancing to Crazy by Britney Spears and expressing his feelings for either me or the guy next to us
You got banned for life from a $30 a night motel. What are you doing with your life?
Randomize
