I saw her while sober, and she is definately cut off from the penis ride
and pubic hair rears its ugly head again
there should be a rule against ugly people hooking up.
yeah...but then what would the ugly people do? hook up with pretty people? yeahhh..don't see that happening in the near future. plus i'm not okay with that.
You were in the corner dancing by yourself yelling "I look good", when really you looked ridiculous and drunk
The only thing I can remember you saying is "I won't cut pizza like this when I'm older."
She uses empty wine bottles as book ends. 2 on each side. At least 8 shelves.
She just dipped a dollar bill in her queso dip and almost ate it before I slapped it out of her hand, no more bar crawls..
She gave 2 thumbs up when Nirvana came on the radio while blowing me in the bathroom
I HAVE A PRESENT FOR YOU AND ITS NOT MY VAGINA
I'm afraid I might run into that fat chick that sucked on me in the hospital parking lot while her friend cried in the car next to us, but I may be willing to take that chance.
Doing laundry. My jeans from last night smell like chicken wings and motor oil.
I want you more than I want a burrito.
I'm not as filling.
That shit was hard as fuck. It felt like a mountain entering my vagina.
carb up bitch. we're drinking with football players.
Bitch I slept on the ground 2 nights running
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