this guy at work is bossing me around at work. He is 24 and still has highlights and spikes his hair.
You're getting bossed around by a 1999 Highschool Yearbook picture?
the trash is collected at 5:50 on mondays. i was up puking all night and heard them
Do I buy ice cream sandwiches or a 40? these are the difficult life decisions I am faced with.
lesson learned: don't narrate out loud about how a girl is giving you head while she's doing it
It's Christmas week. I wouldn't know what to do if i wasn't hung over.
I think we need to teach you what straight means again
I just wanna go somewhere and not be judged for wearing spandex shorts that make my ass look like a slice of fucking heaven. Is that so much to ask??
AT THIS RATE YOU WILL HAVE FUCKED MORE OF MY CLOSE FRIENDS THAN I HAVE PEOPLE PERIOD BY VALENTINE'S DAY.
Nope. Flying out tonight. Staying with my great aunt who is an ex nun turned hostel owner. Best and likely most dangerous St. Patty's Day to commence in 10 hours. IRELAND!
Be safe. And I hate you.
Well she got high, deleted the essay she was working on, and then ordered dominos. We all manage stress in different ways.
I just took the batteries out of the xbox remote so she could replace the dead ones in her vibrator If that's not love I don't know what is
well i don't know if 30 seconds is exactly a good time but at least he bought me breakfast
He has no idea he’s my boyfriend.
He screamed, "Let there be light!" when he came
He hit me with his bagpipe
Isnt that against the lesbian handbook?
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