He wanted me to blow him while he was playing guitar hero. there will not be a second date
I'm actually pretty neutral about a lot of things. I'm like Switzerland with a penis.
but seriously ill do anyone in one of those hats with the earflaps.
I found out that they tried to reenact the Snooki drop by using a jump rope and the banister. Pictures say it all.
About six hours after the bottle of smirnoff, I was googling "losing your stomach lining" and calling my mom for help. She has experience.
I just watched dragonflies fucking. You can't match that level of geek.
Although I would ideally cut back on smoking weed, imagine what getting high and looking for our spirit animals would be like
wearing the bible to the ABC party, thought you'd appreciate that.
Bobbing for jello shots in a bucket of long island. Fast track to alcohol poisoning.
Yeah, we agreed, but I feel like I need at least one more ride on the bonecoaster
Binging muscle relaxers because when ur 33 you can no longer SHAKE IT LIKE A POLAROID PICTURE for 2hrs w/o consequences. Fuck you, Age.
I wish I was taller so I could give these boobs the publicity they deserve.
He's on the porch naked. Help.
you said it was a life or death situation, being your partner for beer pong doesn't count
It started with drunk jenga and ended with me simultaneously peeing and puking on his feet in the tub while he held me up. I met Tequila. I don't like her.
Randomize
