AIM automatically accepts video chats on my laptop. I found this out when I got a text from Jacob after my first attempt at drunk lesbian sex saying, "I'd give it a 7. You need to work on your positioning." I think I'm single now.
I almost got runover on the sidewalk by a car but wen it got closer it was a crackhead walking with the whole front of a car... bumper, lights and all... I love New York.
It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
You skyped me last night to show me the girl passed out on your bed.
By the way, I got bored last night and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
Gong!
YOU'RE MARRIED NOW YOU CAN'T KEEP GONGING ME WHEN YOU GET LAID IT DOESN'T COUNT
You're the only person I know who could blow literal chunks, laugh about it, then proceed to shotgun another beer. Love you champ.
last night on the strip the guy screamed at you YOU GOTTA WORK ON YOUR CALVES.
I don't know which I need first...a shower or a confessional.
I think I've been there, but who knows? I drink a lot
He was so high he started playing Twister on the striped rug. Then when we missed midnight he went on a screaming rampage about his New Year's Eve being meaningless. How do you think it went?
Also, I found this app that is basically a tamagochi from the 90's and now I finally have something to keep me busy at work!
He may be 6' 6" but I'm 180 lbs of pure rage and determination
Why is there a horse in the backyard?
I stayed at my gfs last night. This is all on you.
Now just crop his dad out and add it to the spank bank.
Randomize
