So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
No, the sea-green pills were klonopin, the bright blue ones are adderall. you're probably going to have to adjust your plans for the day.
they fed me a peach. i was laying on the floor telling them how beautiful they were
You told me to pour the Gatorade on you "like Flashdance"
The only good thing about this is that the pharmacy guy will stop trying to add me on Facebook.
Is everything ok? Last time I missed your call you were being arrested.
It's not a good night until someone eats a bagel covered in face mask thinking it's cream cheese
Just so you know swallowing does not help chest colds. Your Phd can suck my dick
we went to the bar with our boss and you tried to play a song from the atm machine
when your 30 and im 37 and we're lonely and single, lets make a pact to murder each other.
New rule. No seeing movies about plane crashes after killer bong rips
Come to Des Moines on Saturday, handcuff yourself to me and drink a bottle of vodka
drunk snapchatting is the worst, because i woke up with great pictures of my tits saved to my memories and no idea who i sent them to
Let's just say that I took off my pants and I had superman boxers on. Then she took off her pants and she had batman panties on. I think she's the one!
I wish period tracker had a "on this day" also so i can see who i was with this day last year.
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