why didn't you poke me back
I'm so horny!
I'm so hungry
WHAT A TERRIBLE REPLY!
For your pussy...
if we dont hook up this weekend, im doing both his roommates
I'm not sure, but I think she had a tampon in when we fucked
No i peed with you in the toilet. The guy I high fived was mid pee in front of the urinal
about 90% sure I fell off a roof. It hurts BAD. Don't suppose you're still in town?
yup haha I infact DID fall off a roof. Want some bomb ass omlettes?
lesson learned.. dressing up like a naughty teacher doesn't mean you can get away with spanking a cop with a ruler for being "fresh" with you
We mailed him an 18 inch double headed dildo for his birthday. The Fedex guys certainly got a laugh out of it.
Jasmine is diving into bushes again.
But for real though. That weed tastes like the jolly laughter of Santa Claus.
I'm drunk. And I'm alone. Eating chicken fingers in my underwear. I'd say life is grand.
i thought this was a perfectly normal conversation between two adult men about why this children's cartoon is quality television but no you just gotta be talking shit again
This is why I should’ve just stuck with blow jobs. I’m good at blow jobs. Blow jobs never fail me.
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
Did you guys just have three hour sex? You both stopped and restarted texting me at the same time
If I were to say yes, would we still be friends?
Randomize
