even after i explained my bobby knight costume the bartender still kicked me out for throwing the chair
I think I just need to sleep with both of them to see which I want to date.
You just went from promiscuous to slut in 3.2 seconds.
is it bad that upon arriving to my fourth sex toy party the sex toy lady instantly recognizes me?
my mom just told me its unladylike to have toothpaste stains on my clothes all the time.. if she only knew.
She had one drink in her cleavage and another in her hand. She kept rotating between the two by leaning backward and then sipping the one in her hand.
For u too. Could be years before u have a finger in ur ass
Safe to say I relapsed into my old chatroulette drunk flashing days.
I can't imagine anything that has a removal ass flap as being sexy
Everyone keeps telling me I look so healthy and happy today: the power of the penis people!!
sidebar: i fucked your brother last night
He did 5 five hand stand push ups and took off his shirt for a barbarian flex. Some girl took off her shirt and threw it at him
Her vagina is like the upper echelon of Scientology and I don't have enough money to get in
So my new thing apparently is getting wasted, showing people my slytherin socks and convincing them I'm slytherin..because why not
Can we get pizza? This is seriously not a booty call. I just really want someone to get pizza with me.
I was supposed to see Marcus tonight and he cancelled. Listen, I shaved my butt hole. Somebody is getting this WAP 😂😂😂😂
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